Your mission is to showcase your skills both on, and off, the dance floor. This may require some adjustment - and it may have less to do with your dance frame, and more to do with your social skills. This may not be for you, but feel free to read through it and forward it to some person who could use it.
Get this right, and you could have a magical night of social dancing. Get this wrong, and you may be on the losing end of the "Why Are Girls at the Salsa Club So Rude?" article. Use these tips wisely, my fellow social dancer - or suffer the consequences.
It's really only in the movies where a woman from across the room points to an unsuspecting guy at a nightclub and mouths the words "I want you." In fact, that's so far fetched it's usually a dream sequence where the guy wakes up holding his pillow in an embarrassing way. The best place to start your social quest is with people that are:
If their body language is directed toward the bar, or to a large muscular companion - avert your eyes and move on to another person. Sometimes a latin club offers a great ambiance, drink specials, or community, yet they may have no interest in dancing. Almost like being a member of a country club, but not owning golf clubs. Some people are just there to socialize.
Accept it and move on my friend.
The best body language you can find as a dancer is, well.... dancing. Your best chance of finding people like that is on the dance floor. Don't hesitate to head onto the floor solo and practice your steps - or mark time in place to the music. When the song ends, make eye contact with someone and politely offer your hand.
If you want to avoid a rude reaction, you've got to be careful with this one. Keep everything about dancing - your demeanor, your conversation, your body language. An attempted pick up line, aggressive body contact, or staring at her with your "Hungry Eyes" will put her on the fast track to the "I think my friends are looking for me" escape (as she's mouthing the word "help!!!" to her friends across the club).
For more on this, read "Eye Contact in Latin Dances: How Much is Too Much"
So let's say the person you asked declined your invitation. Remember, much more is revealed about your confidence and character by how you respond to this ego sting. Average suitors will pout, call the person rude, or worse. That's not you, nor should it be. Your dance skills give you access to the dance floor, but that doesn't mean every person you ask has to agree.
It happens. Stay positive and exit with class, "if at any point you change your mind, I'd be honored to dance with you. Enjoy your evening." Then you smile, walk away, and ask someone else.
When you first started learning to dance, frustration was frequent.
You were learning a skill, and asking your body and brain to sing in harmony together. Nevertheless, you stuck with it. The missed steps were part of a bigger process that got you to this point.
In a nightclub, there's a new level in play. You are asking a person to dance and to move in harmony with you. Just like learning to dance, asking people to dance will go through a similar process, and with equally rewarding results.
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